The High Way to Hell

How does hell want me? Let me count the ways.....

Drunkard - maybe, though cyclical
Liar - Uh, I've been known to tell a few whoppers, yeah
Thief - If office supplies count
Sports fan - Not so much, unless you count politics as sport
Blasphemer - Jesus Christ on a Whole Wheat Cracker yes
Money Lover - If I had it, I promise I would love it
Pagan - Only on my college applications. See Liar.
Homosexual - Part time
Prostitute - If only I'd had the foresight to get paid for it
Witch - Not exactly, but I'm often caled something that rhymes with it
Atheist - Check
Gambler - Hello, MegaMillions! Let me love you.
Porn Lover - Tasteful lesbian porn only
Whoremonger - Let's leave my friends out of this.
Child Molester - No. I hope there's a special corner in Hell for this category.
Evolutionist - Well, it's a theory that I think is pretty cool.....
Pot Smoker - Not anymore, not for a long time
Lesbian - I say half. MathMan thinks two thirds.
Fornicator - Oh, once or twice, I suppose
Masturbator - Only my vibrators know for sure
Hypocrite - Most definitely
Psychic - There was that time that I told Darling Sis if she went out something bad would happen and it did.

And you?

H/T Pharyngula

Originally posted June 2, 2008